Kind of jumping the gun, but hey, who said that ALL fitness had to wait and be written on Friday. As you guys know, I’ve started T25 as my new workout regime. (Yes, so far I am really enjoying it. Only 25 minutes and it’s actually really tough). With this I decided that I needed to change the way that I was eating. No, it’s not that I haven’t been eating bad, actually I would say I have actually changed my eating habits the healthier side of things. It’s just that….you can only eat so many smoothies before you get tired of them. (Even though I doubt I will ever ACTUALLY get sick of eating smoothies.) But seriously…I’ve missed–FOOD.

Course, eating food means that I go back to an old post I made, the one about where I was afraid to eat because of weight gain. Now this might sound ridiculous, it should at least, because it sounds ridiculous to me and I’m the one doing it to myself. But I decided that I needed to get over it, I mean, why be scared of food when that’s what your body needs in order to survive and also keep it healthy. Brings me to the subject–that scale.

I read an article today that really got me thinking. It was called, “Is Your Scale Sabotaging Your Weight Loss”, got me curious because just this morning I stepped on that stupid thing and what did it tell me? I gained a pound. What did I do? Became depressed and angry at myself because I was like, “SERIOUSLY?! After that total body workout I gained a pound?!” (Listen to me, I sound like a freak, OMG I GAINED A POUND). This is something that I’ve actually fought with since the beginning. I know, I know, the scale can be your friend, keep you updated, keep you accountable–but what a scale should never be is the thing that controls you. Like it’s come to control me. Now, I’m going to be deadly honest here: I step on the scale maybe 8-10 times a day. I do it before every meal, before I work out, after I work out…you get the idea. I have let that stupid little device become the thing that dictates my life.

That’s what this article hit on, could the scale actually be a saboteur of your weight loss and your self-esteem? I would have to say yes–for the reasons above and here are some others.   The article was great, and I really suggest you read it. It talked about that “magic number” that all of us want to hit. Are any of you like me, you step on that sucker and if you see it the number go down and you feel like you feel the best you’ve ever felt? But if that number doesn’t show up or you see it slowly ccccrrrreeeeeeeeeeeppppp up you feel like the scum of the earth? I get that way. And I’m sick of it. Author Melissa Costello is so right when she talks about how we use that number and scale as a declaration of our self worth. As she said, “They often get a sense of worth, happiness and value from seeing that “magic number.” But if that number doesn’t appear, they feel deflated and may even feel self-hatred and negative self-judgment about their bodies and their lives. The same can be true for men, too, if they’re trying to build muscle or lose fat. …Even if that number does keep going down, we seem to be basing our own worth and value on that number, rather than focusing on what is important: health!”

Read more: http://www.livestrong.com/blog/scale-sabotaging-weight-loss#ixzz3Dd9REHp0

IT’S SO TRUE!!!! I found myself reading this and nodding at everything she said. I feel this way EVERY. DAY. I step on that scale and if the number goes down I’m like, “YES!! I’M DOING IT, I’M GETTING SO CLOSE TO MY GOAL!!!” But if that number stays the same or goes up–I become sad and “depressed” because I felt like I was doing something wrong. (Trust me again, if you don’t believe me just ask my mom. She’s heard it all and I mean ALL). And like she says, I forget to focus on what I’m actually trying to achieve–my health. I don’t see myself and who I’ve become, or the weight that I’ve actually lost–I see that number and I still feel like I’m that “fat girl” in the old pictures.

So I gave myself a goal. For the rest of the week I would weigh myself ONLY IN THE MORNING!! ONLY!!! (This is going to be hard). And then next week I’m only going to weigh myself when I do my weekly measurements. I’m doing this because I’m tried of looking at the scale and seeing that number either staying the same or going up and not going down as fast as I want too. I’m doing this because I’m going to look in the mirror and see the beautiful woman that I am, that I have been, that I’m going to be! And so, I’m done being this person (it’s the truth though right. This is how I feel ALL the time) :

And more this:

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It’s time to forget the scale (to a point, I mean–I still have goals to reach before Christmas break 😛 ) but it’s time to enjoy life and the body I have now, the rest will come. I’m doing T25 after all 😉

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